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How to Help a Loved One Who Relapses

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When was the last time you joked by saying, “It’s driving me to drink”? Stress does crazy things. It triggers different reactions in different people, some hardly noticeable and others visibly detrimental. Exposure to too much stress for too long can contribute to anxiety. Anxiety leaves a person more susceptible to addiction. It’s a vicious conundrum that countless people are swept into every year.

For the recovering or recovered addict, relapse is a real concern. You might even categorize it as a fear. The greatest terror? Overdose.

Relapse and Accidental Overdose

A study published by Rudolph H. and Bernice S. Moos examined the rate of relapse for previous addicts over 16 years. Participants were surveyed at baseline, one year, three year, eight year, and 16 year intervals. Relapse rates varied between 20 and 80 percent.

For addicts, relapse can be deadly. When stressors cause the want—even the illusion of need—getting a fix can result in an overdose. What if your loved one is one of the lucky ones who relapsed and lived? How can you help them? By using these four tips.

#1: Be Empathetic

Your loved one’s path to recovery may have been bumpy. It no doubt took a toll on you, but it also took a toll on them. Relapse is not a sign of weakness but of war. A war is being waged on the inside, and your friend or family member needs your help.

Help is not always accepted. The best thing to do is be empathetic. Avoid demeaning actions or speech. Above all, do not judge.

#2: Be Available

Sometimes relapse is the result of no support or the feeling of none. Strive always to be available. Yes, this is a tall order, but just picking up the phone for a random conversation at a crazy hour can be the lifeline that tugs your loved one back from another relapse.

#3: Hold Them Accountable

You can hold your loved one accountable while remaining empathetic. When they needed help, you firmly stood for their getting it. When they missed counseling sessions or dropped the ball, you held them accountable. The same applies after a relapse.

Relapse is like taking a step backward. Returning to recovery will be important, but keep in mind that the backward motion may have been less intensive than their previous addiction. Highlight the positives while holding them accountable for their chosen actions.

#4: Be a Positive Force

Self-destruction can impede recovery and cause a relapse. It can also occur after a setback, and sometimes be more intense. Counter negativity with positivity. Focus on what has been achieved, but don’t downplay the relapse. Your loved one could have died, but they didn’t.

Being a positive force includes not giving up. Relapse happens, but it doesn’t have to be a trendsetter. Don’t allow it to discourage you or your loved one. You are both stronger than backward motion, and you can both overcome it and get back on the right track.

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